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Lunch thoughts…

No, I’m not already thinking about food.  Honest I’m not.  Well, I sorta am, but not in the “OH GOD I’M HUNGRY” way.

Yeah, yeah, I know, I’m confusing you.  I’m confusing my self, so bear with me while I ramble.

Lunch is a downfall for me because I’m the type of person who will go out and get something, even if I’ve got something with me unless I absolutely lovelovelove what’s in my lunch bag.  And the bag itself plays an important role.  I will not, under any circumstances take a brown paper bag.  And no, I don’t know why, and no, I have no clue why I’ve got that issue.  Maybe it was one too many bologna sandwiches in the second grade, I dunno.

But.  I digress.  Or do I?

So, my Mom (yes, my Mommy.  Shut up.) was invited to a Tupperware party a few weeks ago, and she knows about my issues (some of them anyway) and decided to be sweet and order me a lunch bag.  Number one, I thought that was very sweet of her, and number two…heeeey, that’s kinda cute.  And!  I just got it yesterday.  While not exactly like that picture, it’s still cute as all get out.

And what’d it make me feel like doing?  Cooking!

So for the second night in a row (and after a very cool workout at the gym I might add with Danielle where she kicked my butt) I cooked dinner.  There I was, in the kitchen, sweating even more after being able to wring my hair out when I got home, sauteeing a chicken breast and prepping some veggies.  And of course it wasn’t just for dinner…

I have leftovers for lunch!  In my pretty new bag!

Tucked inside, I have:

  • 1 Pita Bread (1 serving is half a pita, and I know I’ll eat both halves)
  • 6 grape tomatoes, quartered
  • 1 cup off chopped lettuce (romaine)
  • 8 black olives, halved
  • 1 roasted beet, sliced
  • red onion, sliced thin
  • 3 oz chicken breast, sliced thin (pan sauteed in olive oil with salt, pepper, oregano, basil, a bit of garlic)
  • 1 tbsp tatzikki sauce (no clue how to spell that, and the spell checker just laughed at me yo.)
  • Unsweetened Chai Tea

I did have a Sabra Hummus and Pretzels for a snack in the afternoon, but I ended up eating it for breakfast.  Lemme just say, I really like their hummus.  It’s a bit on the salty side, but when I can’t make my own it’s not bad.  The pretzels were more like pretzel chips and they were really crunchy and tasty.

So, does this mean I’ll cook every night and bring my lunch every day?  In all honesty?  Probably not.  But, even one or two days out of the week won’t be bad with bringing my lunch, and if I start out with the goal of making leftovers, I might be encouraged to cook more.

It’s at least a start in getting back on track.

<3

Five Minutes….

So, back in the day, when my Pops was still around to torment me and drive me insane, he and I would play this stupid game.  At least, back then I thought it was stupid.  Now, I’m not so sure.

It was the “Five Minute” game.  If you didn’t like what you were doing, keep doing it for five minutes.  JUST five minutes.  If you still didn’t like it?  Then you stopped.  If it wasn’t so bad, then you went on.  I can remember being little and him telling me that rule for everything, be it for playing a game, doing homework, reading a book I wasn’t crazy about, whatever.  Keep it up for five minutes, and then, if you don’t like it, stop.

Well…his birthday is tomorrow, and I’ve been thinking about him all week.  He really popped into my head this past Sunday when I was at the gym.

See, I’ve got this love hate relationship with the Eliptical machine.  I love the fact that you can burn so many calories, but I hate the fact that it’s hard as hell for me to use it.  I’ve also got this…issue.  I like being in the last row of whatever, so nobody’s staring at me while they’re working out.

I know, I know, people aren’t staring at me, they’re just off in their own little world doing their own little thing.  But, I have issues.  Then again, my issues have issues, so, yeah.

But, on Sunday as I got off the treadmill, I thought of my Pops and stared at the Eliptical.  Just five minutes.  I could do five minutes, couldn’t I?  yeah, I’d just walked an hour (and for me, let’s just say that’s a miracle and leave it at that) but…

Five minutes.

And the only machines open were in the very first row, where people could stare at me.  What’s funnier than a fat chick on one of those things, huffing and puffing away?

C’mon Shoop, it’s just five minutes…

Have I mentioned I talk to myself a lot?  Well, I do.  And I did that day as I hauled myself up onto the machine and began my quest for five minutes.  And it would have been ONLY five minutes.  Except when I reached the five minute mark, I didn’t feel so bad.  So I went a little bit more.  Just two more minutes, for a total of seven minutes on that thing, but…I did it.

And yeah, it wasn’t amazing and all that jazz, but now I’m thinking when can I do another five minutes?

Thanks for the lesson Pops.  Miss you.

<3

 

I’ve mentioned it before and I’ll mention it again:  I’m a stress eater.  When things get hectic to a point where I can’t ‘stand’ it, I tend to eat like mad.  It wouldn’t be a bad thing if what I ate was stuff like lettuce, carrots, bell peppers and the like.

But no, I have to want things like pizza and baklava and crap like that.

Or do I?

As recent as 48 hours ago I had a row with a dear friend.  I adore this girl, despite her crass and sometimes abrasive nature.  We’ve fallen out of touch with both our lives going in different directions and on Thursday it came to a head.  It wasn’t horrible by any stretch of the imagination, but it was…enough.

Thursday afternoon when I left the office for lunch, I had it in mind to stop and get the most fattening, disgustingly greasy bbq platter I could get my claws on.  I even knew what sides I wanted.  I’d gotten the number of a new bbq joint and tucked it into my Blackberry and off I went.  When I dialed and the girl put me on hold, I’d considered my sides, and even my dessert.  I got disconnected and my irritation grew.  When I called back I finally got someone on the phone to take my order.

I ordered a boneless rib sandwich and a side of mac and cheese.

While not the healthiest thing in the universe, it was a far cry from what I’d been planning to order.  And the kicker?  I’d ordered it on auto pilot.  When I pulled into the CVS parking lot next to the joint to pick up some nail polish, I couldn’t remember a damn thing I’d ordered.  And yet, when I walked in she handed me my bag and my total was $8.99 rather than the $23.57 I’d calculated.

Um…what?

I went back to teh office, fully expecting to still be angsting since I didn’t get my ‘make me feel better!’ food, and I sat at the back desk and ate.

Now, I could go on about how damn good that sandwich was (and believe me, it was amazing), or I could go on about how I was hiding from my boss so I could actually eat.  Or I could even mention the guy I work with being an absolute fan of this place.  Well…I just did, but that’s beside the point.

When I was finished with my sandwich, I tossed my container away, took my mac and cheese and went up front.  The mac and cheese stayed untouched, and when I finally did take a bite I found I didn’t like it at all and threw it right out.

This makes me wonder:  This whole ‘emotional eating’ thing I say I do.  Is it something I do while I’m well aware of what I do, or is it something I do when I’m not paying attention.

Thursday showed me that if I’m not paying attention, I’m still not going to choose the healthiest fare, but I necessarily won’t be choosing the worst either.

Now that’s food for thought.

When it comes to cooking, or even growing food, I believe very strongly in Chi.  No, it has nothing to do with tea, and everything to do with your life force.

Okay, look.  I know when someone spouts philosophy at you, you wanna run away, but c’mon!  Give me a chance at least dude.

Still there?  Good.  Now, where was I?

Oh yeah, Chi.  The Chi I speak of is denoted as “Life Force” in the Chinese culture and may be spelled Ch’i.  Of course, I got that off of Wikipedia so it might be wrong.

But I digress.  Again.

When you cook or grow food for someone you love, it always turns out better.  It tastes better, it makes them happy, it makes people smile.  That’s because you’re putting part of yourself into it.  Now, obviously, I don’t mean you’re hacking off a finger and using it to flavor the dish, and if you are…seek medical attention.  And don’t feed me anything.

There’s a reason people usually love Mom’s cooking above all others.  She’s cooking for her family, and even if she’s dead on her feet, she loves her kids and she’s going to give them the best she’s got.  Same thing with the husband who does his damndest to cook for his wife that he’s been madly in love with for 10 years.  Even if he burns the steaks, something in that meal is bound to be damned good.  Even if it’s just a beer that he poured from a bottle.

Still not convinced?  Check this out.

Go home tonight and think off the one person you love more than anyone else in the world.  Or hell, if that’s too cheesy, think of a beloved pet you’ve lost, or even a dear friend.  Go over memories of the good times as you do something as simple as toss together a salad.  If you want to make something a little fancier, be my guest, but keep that person in mind.  If the memories are bitter sweet, don’t be afraid to let a tear fall.

I bet you sit down to one of the best meals you’ve had in a while.  Leave me a comment and let me know how it turned out.

*_*_*

See that little thing up there, that fancy *_*_*  ?  That signifies a topic switch in my world.  Just figured I’d let ya know.

No that I’ve got people thinking I’m crazy, let’s reinforce that idea!  During my traipsing around the gym (yes I just said traipsing), I ran into a personal trainer who stopped to chat with Colleen and myself.  Turns out, she’s getting an organic grocery delivery every other week.  Like, organic veggies delivered right to her door!  In the Metro area!

I had to investigate, and asked her to send me an invite.  Lo and behold, an invite from Door To Door Organics  So, I clicked on it and decided to check it out.  Well, I got my first delivery on Friday, June 24th!

It arrived with one ice pack in a cardboard box clearly labeled.  I took pictures, but a photographer I’m so very not, so please excuse the images.

So, when it arrived I was so very happy.

It's HERE!!!

Door to Door Organics

I set it on the counter and made room in my fridge, because I did have two heads of lettuce in there.  I wasn’t sure what to expect, so I think being concerned was valid.  I’ve seen organic produce in some stores and sometimes it looks like the fertilizer is part of the product.

And by that, I mean some organic produce looks like crap!

So what would I find in my box?!  ACK!!!  THE SUSPENSE!!!

…Note to self:  Stop being silly and open the damn box.

Hey look, STUFF!

So I take a peek inside the box and I’m actually REALLY happy with it.  The lettuce looks great, and there’s a couple of zucchini in there, along with two peaches, two plums, half a pound of peas (still in pods!) and a couple other odds and ends that I can’t remember at the moment.

This is where I show that while I might love to cook, I’ve never been on a farm.  The peas?  You had to shuck them.  And I had no concept of this.  When I finally did figure it out, I steamed them with some garlic and found that I couldn’t stop smiling until well after I’d eaten the last one.  What we find in the market or frozen in a bag is no substitute for fresh.  Those were delish!

The peaches and the plums however were rock hard.  I ate one plum, just to say I did and then left the others on the counter.  And again, here’s where you can tell I don’t know everything:  I had no clue the fruit would continue to ripen.  I happened to pick up a peach this morning to find that it’d gone from rock hard (as in you could hurt someone with that damn thing) to surprisingly soft.  On the off chance that it’d be edible, I tossed both peaches and the remaining plum into my lunch bag this morning.

When I bit into the first peach, juice ran down my chin and I was happy there was nobody in the office.  I squeaked and grabbed a napkin, but was absolutely shocked at the transformation of the fruit in my hand.  It was deliciously juicy and the smell was like every poetry laced sonnet to the fruit I’d ever heard.  It really was that damn good.

The lettuce will be part of a Triple Berry Salad tonight with a home made raspberry dressing, and the bell pepper and carrots you can see in the image were part of a stir fry on Sunday.

So.  Let’s talk price.  DtD offers up what’s called a “Bitty Box”, and for me, it’s perfect.  It’s $23.00 a week and they deliver to your home or office.  Now, for some $23.00 is a lot to pay, but when you consider I spend that much money on produce anyway, and it’s not nearly as good at the store as what I can get in this box…  You be the judge.  Seriously, check out the link and see what’s on plate for this week.  And if you’re not up for the weekly box?  They have it bi-weekly as well, and they also offer different sizes along with allowing for substitutions.  Again, if you decide to give it a shot, let me know what you thought.  I love feedback!

*_*_*

I don’t just cook and eat ya know.  I read too!  And one of my latest fave books comes from Joe Hill and the book is called Heart Shaped Box.  It starts off slow, but once the main antagonist shows up…YIKES does it get going.  There isn’t so much gore in this story as there are ideas of the gore, and that is actually pretty cool.

As a side note, if you get the audio book from Audible (and I’m assuming all other formats), the narrator does an amazing job of voicing the “ghost”.  Just…trust me.

*_*_*

Imagine my surprise to find out that Detroit now has a “Cool Factor”  Or, ya know, maybe I already knew it.  When it comes to the Motor City, people enjoy dragging us down, talking about how much crime there is, how there’s corruption everywhere and so many other things it’s not even funny.  And the television media plays that up.  Who cares about the small neighborhoods that band together to take care of each other?  They’d rather run stories on the East Side where there’s a drive by to keep things interesting.  Seldom will you see anyone outside of Detroit talking about the good things we have going.

And what are some of the good things?

Neighborhoods still hold block parties and there are places where yes, we know our neighbors.  We have our own gardens and we chat across our back fences and ask how each other’s day was.  Kids can run up and down the street in areas and not have to worry too much.  We take care of our own, watching out for each other and checking in on our elderly neighbors without robbing them.

In other words, we’re just like your area.  Yes, Detroit has it’s problems, but so does everyplace else.  But we also have our good points.  I’m waiting for the media to latch onto that.

But I doubt they will.  The good things about Detroit would never sell as well or draw as many viewers as Kilpatrick’s latest stint after all…

Catch ya later.

I never thought I’d say this, but eating healthy isn’t always an easy thing!

No, no, wait and hear me out on this one.

When I think “Healthy Eating”, I think of salads, whole grain pasta, grilled chicken.  You know, the good stuff.  Which is delicious!!  I can’t count the number of times I’ve purred over a salad with romaine lettuce, paper-thin wisps of onion, fresh berries and a sprinkling of parmesan cheese.  And when I say sprinkling, I do mean a sprinkling.  About a 1/4 teaspoon over 4 cups of lettuce.

Any clue where I’m going with this?  Well, stick around for another minute or so.

When I “Eat Healthy”, I go balls to the wall.  In all the wrong ways, let me just say.  That salad I mentioned above?  That’d be my lunch most days during the summer.  It’s AMAZING, and no, I don’t use dressing because I like the taste of lettuce.

I see how you’re looking at me.  People LIKE lettuce, okay?  Don’t judge us!

I digress.

So, that salad.  Sounds healthy right?  And mind you, it’s a BIG salad.  There’s one major problem with it though.  No protein.  Hindsight is always 20/20 in my world (which is fine, they know me here), and when I notice a lunch like that in my notebook, suddenly my ravenous hunger later that day (say, in about an hour) makes perfect sense.  Yes, there’s fiber in that salad thanks to the berries, but where the hell is the protein?

Now, I don’t necessarily mean meat or animal protein.  Tossing a few garbanzo beans (chickpeas) or black beans into that salad would be wonderful!  But at the time I make it and eat it, I’m thinking “don’t overdo the additions, don’t overdo the additions…”  And I’m someone who knows better, who’s taken at least one nutrition course and loves reading the latest nutrition information!

Logically I know I shouldn’t eat like that.  Yes, it’s healthy, but I weigh over 300 lbs (at the moment), and I know those fruit and veggies, while GOOD for me, they won’t give me the nutrition I need and it’s going to bring my metabolism to a stand still.  Either that, or it’s going to leave me so famished that by the end of the day, White Castle is looking damn tasty.

With that said, what the hell is eating healthy?  Is it restricting calories?  If so, HOW do you restrict calories?  What’s a good balance of protein versus fruits versus veggies?  How much water do I really need to drink?  Do I go by the USDA’s MyPlate guidelines?  Or is that for when I get healthy?  Or maybe I need to hang out at Weight Watchers and learn a thing or two.  Oh hell I get FIFTY POINTS?!?!  (Yes, that’s 50).  I’ll never eat that much food!  Or maybe Atkins had it right all along?

And then we get into the whole “How many calories do you need to simply exist!” scenario, which involves calculating your BMI and…yeah.

Can’t someone give me a simple answer?  Maybe they could, if I could ask a simple question.

What is a girl supposed to eat in order to…maintain or gain optimum health, and lose weight at the same time?  How much protein?  How much whole grain?  And what does it translate to in my language, which isn’t grams or ounces.  Is there a simple way to explain nutrition?

I mean, yes, we all know that part of a healthy diet is limiting the fried foods and staying away from the cholesterol crap.  And if you didn’t, you need help dude, for real.

Maybe eating healthy isn’t the same for everyone.  Maybe that’s why there are ‘guidelines’ instead of hard and fast rules.  I mean, I know I’m not going to do very well with those damn salads no matter how good they taste, so…maybe this is something I need to figure out for myself.  I know I need more calories than the average chick (at the moment) to keep my body from freaking out.  And I know I need to eat protein.  And I know if I refuse myself a bit of chocolate each day it only leads to disaster.

Urgh, considering all the possibilities is making my head spin.  However, I’m going to figure this out if it’s the last thing I do.  And considering I just might end up killing myself when I hang out with my personal trainer on Wednesdays, it might really be the last thing I do!  ;-)

Until then, take a peek at a new app I found:  MyFitnessPal  It’s a free download from iTunes and I’ve been playing with it today.  And it’s already complaining at me because I skipped breakfast…

Niiiiice.  >.<

I’ve asked myself the above question many, many times, and have really never gotten a straight answer.  And considering I’m answering me, that’s a bit strange.

I’ve recently gone back to the gym, training with Colleen this time around.  It was right on the heels of a serious health scare for me. For the past ten years (yes, ten years), I’ve had the most irritating cough.  It wouldn’t stop, I’d cough in the morning, at night, at work, at school, in the store, in the yard.  Constantly.  Just this past Spring, right around Easter, I began feeling a very strange fluttering sensation in my chest.  One that made me sit up and take notice because, yeah, weird sensations in my chest.  Tell me who wouldn’t freak out about that.

So I talk to my boss, he makes sure myself and another coworker are set up with health insurance, and then I go to the doctor.  It was a Tuesday.  Not only did I find out I weighed 324 pounds (down from the 347 I had been), but I found out that my coughing is caused by acid reflux.

Acid reflux, which is pretty much caused by my diet.  I mean, let’s face it, I’m 324 lbs for a reason.

I call myself an emotional eater, and in reality, I am.  I eat when I’m happy, I eat when I’m sad, I eat when I’m comfortable, when I’m bored, when I’m content, when I’m angry…  I’m surprised I’m not sitting here with food in my mouth.  I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve turned myself into a volume eater, and it’s friggin’ absurd.

The real rub is that I have no clue how the hell to stop.  I mean, I’ve got a clue, and I tend to do WONDERFULLY for a week…maybe even a month.  But then, something happens.

I get angry.  I’m not talking just a general miffed that creeps up on you around ‘that time of the month’.  I’m talking the type of anger where if that person was in front of them, I wouldn’t trust myself to tell them off and make them cry.  And that is my undoing.  Because I’d rather shove something in my mouth instead of ripping someone’s head off.

And then I get pissed because I just derailed everything I’ve done over the last month.  Logically, I know one burger or one candy bar or one whatever isn’t going to do me in, especially not after busting my ass for however many days.  I know that.  But do I pay attention?

Not one damn bit.

And 90% of the time, that’s what throws me off my game.  I know what I should do, but I choose not to do it.  Why?!  Why the hell can’t I do this one simple thing?  Me, the chick with the head on her shoulders, the witty comebacks, the one who loves life!  I have no clue, and I’d give anything to figure it out.

Instead, I undo everything I’ve done and have no clue why.

I’d love to say it’s someone else’s fault.  It’s my Mom’s fault for sending me to Tim Horton’s to get her a cappucino.  It’s my brother’s fault for wanting burgers.  It’s my sister’s fault for whatever reason.  But no, they’ve done nothing wrong.  It’s all me.

So now, I just have to figure out how to make it all come undone.  Literally figure out how to retrain myself after over 30 years of the same behavior.

I guess there’s no better time to start than the present, right?

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